Friday I drove the merde-mobile 3 hours to Peoria for a deposition. Merde because before last night's rainfall, it looked like a flock of birds hovered over my car for a collective cathartic poo. I didn't even realize the extent of the situation until I was filling 'er up with PRACTICALLY FREE GAS (woohoo!) and got a glimpse of her brown and white speckled rear. It was brinking on cryptococcosis scary. Realizing there was no time to hit the car wash, I made a mental note to park as far away from the deposition as possible, lest anyone whose respect I'd like to keep see me entering or exiting the vehicle.
My travels out were uneventful. I passed THREE of those blue signs that say "Attractions Exit X," and they.were.all.blank. No kidding. Oh, and I also passed an enormous accumulation of dirt on an otherwise maddeningly flat terrain, which had grown some funny grass on top and looked exactly like a giant hairy mole growing on the side of the highway. I wish I'd had my camera for both oddities, but murphy's law applies to my camera carrying habits. In the off chance I forget to put it in my bag, the likelihood I'll see something picture-worthy increases exponentially. Murphy is cruel.
With all this stimulation on the side of the road, I was also annoyed at myself for forgetting to bring along CDs I hadn't listened to in awhile. After patiently enduring Fleet Foxes for the fourth time in a row, and vetoing my own bright idea to drive with iPod headphones on, I made the life-threatening decision to stick my hand in car crevices to search for longlost CDs. First I fished out Pedro the Lion, which reminds me of Teenage Fanclub vocals mixed with Interpol instrumentation.
It was a-otay for awhile, but I went in for another reach, this time coming up with a few furballs and some mixes made by a bartender/musicologist from the local dive. One mix ended up being a hilarious accompaniment to my drive in the way the music so starkly contrasted the view. Jockey Full of Bourbon (vid above) was probably the most fitting, while Casino Royale was so unfitting it made me laugh out loud as I was driving. Really, imagine yourself driving down the highway to the accompaniment of this ditty. It's funny.
On the way home I did my usual - replayed the dep and kicked myself for questions I should have asked. And then... this little bird, trying to fly her way home, got herself her first ever speeding ticket. Blasted.